The Universe is Absurd

The universe is completely and utterly absurd. It all supposedly started with a single point, called a “singularity”. This point contained the whole universe. This point is a logical impossibility. Literally, everything fails to compute. Now, hold on. Here's where I get REALLY uncomfortable. I'm an accountant, so when it fails to compute I just go nutso! AAHH!! Whatever happened to my calculator!? Well, I guess a black hole suck it right in!

Regardless, the singularity is basically “nothing”, but it is also something, because everything came out of this nothing. Needless to say, for some absurd completely unreasonable incomprehensible reason, this shit decided to explode and create (oh, pardon me skeptics... “produce”) most of the present universe within seconds! Holy Macaroni (I'm part Italian)! That's a lot of shit coming out of a hole in a second!! As my wife usually says, in the beginning there was a big “fluff”. But I usually call it “fart” (yeah, I'm a man, she's a women, everything is delicate for women, “fluff” is certainly more delicate then “fart”, regardless, I'm starting to ramble... I'm writing this as she speaks on the background, by the way...)

Ok. So after all the mess the singularity made, we are now in a weird universe where everything is attracted and repelled by weird forces and those forces create stuff, right? But whatever happened to the “nothing” surrounding the singularity (which was basically “nothing” as well)? The question is... is there something outside of the universe? Maybe “nothing”, but not “nothing” as we know it? The universe is expanding towards “nothingness”? So how big does that make the universe, giagaenourmous, and then more gigaenourmous when it expands (by the way, who know maybe the universe is not expanding)?

As if all that crazy absurd preposterous incomprehensible stuff wasn't enough, the universe happened to evolve and create (oh, pardon me skeptics... “produce”) more and more complex substances until it produce a sentient “living being” with a superior telencephalon (which, by the way, is often used to destroy others of the same species, don't ask me why it is a long story, completely absurd) which is constantly questioning the validity of its own questioning. Oh, and by the way, this sentient “living being” with a superior telencephalon is what we call a “human” and the human condition is by far the most fascinating and absurd thing in the whole freaking universe (oh! I'm so arrogant! It's like there are no others like us or better then us in the whole freaking GIGAENOURMOUS universe!).

Well, that was my first rant. Come back for more later!

This is Yonescoh, the One and Only, God of the Absurd, reporting from planet Earth, somewhere in the vast oceans of truthfullness...